Finance for non-financial Managers - Section1: Global Financial systems

A NAMIBIAN CORPORATION
* You have two cows.
* You make biltong

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
* You have two cows.
* You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
* You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

A SOUTH AFRICAN CORPORATION
* You have two cows.
* You go on strike because you want three cows.
* They get stolen, so you blame the previous regime' and steal someone else's cows and shoot their owner.

A ZIMBABWEAN CORPORATION
* A farmer has two cows.
* You take over his farm, eat both cows and wait for the international community to supply more.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION
* You have two cows.
* You re-design them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
* You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION
* You have two cows.
* You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

A BRITISH CORPORATION
* You have two cows.
* Both are mad.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION
* You have two cows.
* You pray to them for food.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
* You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
* You break for lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
* You have two cows.
* You count them and learn you have five cows.
* You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
* You count them again and learn you have 12 cows.
* You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

A SWISS CORPORATION
* You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
* You charge others for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION
* You have two cows.
* You have 300 people milking them.
* You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.

AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
* You have two cows.
* The one on the left is kinda cute